Three Knocks at the Door
by melanie39
Summary: A series of short conversations, set immediately after The Cold Turkey.
1. Chapter 1

_**A series of short conversations, set immediately after The Cold Turkey**_  
**Three Knocks at the Door** 1/3

**Beta:** **loracj2**  
**Word Count:** 500 words approx  
**Spoilers:** Through to the end of The Cold Turkey

**The First Knock**

"Seth?"

"Come in."

"Hey…"

"Hey, mom."

Kirsten sits down on the bed and squeezes the hand of her biological son.

"All our visitors gone?" Seth inquires, implying an interest that Kirsten knows is not there.

"Your dad's just dropping Darryl off at the shelter. We offered him and his friend Bill beds for the night, but it seems the late night soup run beckons."

Seth snickers at that, but he still stares straight ahead, and his dark brown eyes still retain the troubled look that hasn't left them since Ensenada.

"Julie?"

Kirsten shakes her head.

"No, she's still in the pool house talking to Ryan."

She can see he doesn't get it. Doesn't get how Julie can waltz in and take away his grieving best friend, only to have them both laughing within five minutes. Wasn't that his job?

"They need each other right now. They need each other more than they need us."

Seth pulls his hand away from his mother's and folds his arms across his chest.

"He didn't even look at me. When he came back with Dad. He just walked to the end of the table, didn't even glance my way."

"Give him some time, Seth."

"What if he never forgives me?"

Kirsten knows this won't happen. Thinks this won't happen. Prays this won't happen.

"He's not the Ryan we know. But the Ryan we know is in there somewhere, and he'll come back and that Ryan will forgive you. That Ryan will know you didn't do anything that needs forgiveness. That Ryan knows you love him."

"And if that Ryan never comes back?"

Kirsten thinks back to what she and Sandy have watched through the pool house windows. She doesn't know what they were saying to each other, but she saw enough to know that the Ryan in the pool house is not the same Ryan that traveled back with her from Ensenada twenty four hours earlier; that whatever happened with Volchok in that motel room has somehow enabled him to draw a line underneath what happened.

"I think he's already back. But now that he is, he has a lot of things to deal with. Things that he's been hiding from. Things that are buried deep inside him. All things that I know you'll be right by his side to help him deal with. Look after him, Seth. Just because he's not about to run off and try and kill someone doesn't mean he won't need you."

Seth ponders this, but he's still not convinced that Ryan will ever trust him again. He hasn't forgotten the shove. He hasn't forgotten the phone flying though the air, Ryan's barely veiled contempt flying along with it. He hasn't forgotten Ryan, hand cradling the bedpost, his voice so cold Seth's heart pretty much froze right there and then.

And he wonders how to tell his mother that Ryan's really scared him this time, and he's not sure he even wants to be there for him any more…

**tbc**


	2. Chapter 2

_**A series of short conversations, set immediately after The Cold Turkey**_  
**Three Knocks at the Door** 2/3

**Beta:** **loracj2**  
**Word Count:** 800 words approx  
**Spoilers:** Through to the end of The Cold Turkey

**Three Knocks at the Door – Part Two.**

"Seth?"

"Come in, Dad." If Seth is disappointed that it's his father's voice outside the door and not Ryan's, he doesn't show it.

"Your mom and I are just about to watch a movie. Want to join us?"

Seth shakes his head.

"Not even a Japanese anime special?"

There's no response.

His father ambles over to his son's bed and sits beside him. Seth heaves himself up from his position of choice, arms behind head, resting against his pillow. His legs fall awkwardly over the edge of the bed frame.

"Your mother said you were still worrying over this issue with Ryan."

Seth shrugs and Sandy hesitates a moment. A non-rambling Seth is always a cause for immediate concern.

"You know, he will speak to you again. What do you think he'll do? Hole up in the pool house till you leave for RISD?"

"Would that be a bad thing?"

"Seth!"

Troubled brown eyes are all Sandy has seen for the last five months but it doesn't get any easier to look into them. For once, a Sandy Cohen lecture does not trip off his tongue. For once, Sandy Cohen is at a loss for words.

"What happened tonight?" The words threaten to choke Seth as he forces them out.

It's his father's turn to shrug.

"Volchok walked out in one piece. And so did Ryan. That's pretty much all I need to know."

"So he didn't beat him to a pulp then?"

Sandy is bewildered.

"Did you really think he would?"

"Didn't you?" Seth challenges. And Sandy can't deny that moment of hesitation he felt as he watched Ryan emerge from the hotel room. He can't forget that heart in the mouth feeling as he waited to see if Volchok would come out on his feet or on a gurney.

"I had to trust him to do the right thing."

Seth's smirk is bitter.

"And there's the difference, Dad. I didn't trust him. I didn't know for sure that he wouldn't kill him."

Sandy interrupts.

"And you couldn't risk him ruining his life. I'm not sure which of us was right here. I'm not sure there is a right or wrong answer to all this. What if I'd called it wrong? He could be in prison right now."

"But you didn't call it wrong, did you?"

"That doesn't mean you did, Seth. Don't underestimate what you did for him. Don't underestimate what it must have felt like for him to see me and your mother turn up in Mexico."

"I know how he felt, Dad. That's why the pool house has been out of bounds to me for three days."

Sandy shakes his head dismissively.

"He may still be angry with you now. But, like I said in the car, he'll look back at this, and he'll understand why you did what you did."

Seth picks at the hem of his shirt. He has a question.

"Were you really sure he wouldn't hurt Volchok?"

Sandy knows he won't lie to Seth.

"I can't stand here and say I knew for sure. I think if he'd gotten to Volchok in Mexico he probably would have hurt him. Badly. Killed him even, much as I hate to think so. But I think he finally got it after he saw the three of us, all racing after him.

"Got it?"

"That we're never going to let him go, whatever he does."

"He scared me."

"I know. And it's not the first time. I know that too. And you've stuck with him. That says a lot."

"Like I'm that desperate for a friend?"

Sandy smiles now but his eyes don't hide his pride.

"It tells me how much you love him. It also tells me what a great friend you are to have."

Sandy slaps his son's thigh affectionately.

"Hang in there, Seth. I think Ryan's got as close to the edge as he can, and he doesn't like how it looks. If ever he needed you, now's the time. Be there for him as he works his way back. Don't be the sort of person Ryan's had to deal with his whole life."

Sandy gets up to leave because he knows his son, and he knows Seth will be there for Ryan, even if Seth himself isn't as confident.

tbc


	3. Chapter 3

**The Third Knock**

"Yeah, what is it?" His answer is careless, resigned.

"I brought you some pie. Your mom said you skipped it."

The voice behind the door makes Seth's stomach lurch despite himself.

He barely glances up as the other boy enters but he still sees the bruising, dark circles of exhaustion shadowing his friend's face. Ryan hasn't been looking his best recently, but this is a new low.

"Kind of lost my appetite."

Ryan bites his lip and lingers, hovering by the door.

"I'm not sure if she made it," he offers hesitantly.

Seth shakes his head, just a little. If Ryan thinks it'll raise a smile, he's wrong.

"Taylor made it," Seth answers flatly.

Ryan nods and edges closer, places the pie on the nightstand.

Seth slides up to a sitting position and there's room for Ryan to sit, if he perches right on the edge.

"Julie gone?" Seth inquires.

Ryan nods again.

Seth can't help but ask.

"What'd she want?"

Ryan shrugs his shoulders and stares down at his feet.

"You know, talk and stuff."

"About what happened tonight?" Seth doesn't mean for his voice to sound accusatory.

"No. About…..Marissa." Ryan's voice is a mumble.

Seth scoops his knees up to his chest.

"Is she OK?"

Ryan ponders.

"I think….she will be."

"What about you?"

Ryan ignores this question but looks up, capturing Seth's eyes with his own.

"I'm sorry. For the phone, the yelling…..the pool house…"

"You scared me."

"Marissa told me that once." His directness disarms Seth for a moment.

"What did you say?"

"That sometimes I scare myself."

Seth has no reply to that.

"So, what about Volchok?"

"I punched him."

Seth nods sagely.

"Did that feel…?"

"For about 5 seconds…" Ryan answers, the words tumbling out in a rush.

"So, what next?"

"Nothing. It's over."

"You don't want to kill him any more?"

Ryan stares across the room, unseeing.

"What would be the point?" he says quietly.

"So, what happens now?"

Seth waits patiently for an answer.

"I have to get on with my life."

Seth can only just make out Ryan's last words.

"Will you help me?"

**The End**


End file.
